AYAdik

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Kagabi, ang rami kong tanong.

Kanina, sinabi ko sa sarili ko aalamin ko na ang sagot. 

Itatanong ko na.

Nang biglang…

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Sino ka nga ba? 
Ano ka ba? 
Bakit ka nga ba narito? 
Taga-saan ka nga uli? 
Paano nagkaganito?

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Akala ko nakalimutan ko na. 
Akala ko wala na ako pakialam. 
Akala ko kebz na lang. 
Pero nagkamali ako. 
Napanaginipan lang kita…

Bumalik galit ko sayo.

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Here we are again. This is where we part ways. I kept my mouth shut up until the moment we let go of each other’s hand. 
He waved me goodbye as he said “Let’s do this again next time.”  
Deep inside I was hoping that “next time” would come very soon.

A lot of things then come running inside my mind – things I want him to know. 
I wasn’t able to tell him. Maybe today isn’t the day for that.

I prepared the perfect speech to tell him how I really feel. 
I know this would be awkward but I just have to let him know. I just can’t hide these feelings anymore, I just have to tell him.

I made sure every word I will use is correct – that it would never create any misunderstanding. I prepared myself for possible questions to be raised later on. 
It’s as if I am preparing myself for a thesis defense.

I then decided that the next time we would meet, I would definitely tell him. 
This may be the last time we could be together because of what I have to say. 
But that doesn’t matter, he just has to know.

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tae-mong-mabaho Asked:

Tag, you're it! Here are the rules: Each tagged person must post ten things about themselves. You have to choose and tag ten people. Go to their blogs and tell them you tagged them :D

AYAdik Answered:

Ok sige. XD

1. Child of God. (:
2. 4’11”.
3. I don’t like Physics and I hate History.
4. I love keys.
5. Wants to be a mangaka. Became a software engineer. XD
6. Two of my worst habits: nailbiting and smelling stuffs.
7. 7 is  ♥.
8. time waits for no one..
9. Annoyingly noisy. Disturbingly quiet.
10. The name’s AYA.

but I’m not tagging. :\ … yet. XD maybe later

Wisdom tooth : Something worse than PMS. ><

I’ve got this feeling I need to go somewhere…

Somewhere I can find peace…

THAT kind of peace.

I’m not referring to Never Land this time.

I just want to go somewhere.

Just somewhere.

Even if it means I’m going by myself.

And when I had my mind set up to where I’m going to go,

rain falls.

…

I will still go..

Maybe not this time..

Maybe on some other day..

Or some other night..

And maybe with someone.

Dili na unta mag`linog balik. ><

No more earthquake, please.

So traumatic. ><

Thank You jud kaau, Lord, as in! 

You were supposed to be a dream.. a beautiful paradise. 
A land of hope and happiness.

I nurtured the thought, hoping that someday, all of these would come. 
I know that I am not supposed to take care of you. 
But deep inside, I really want you.

But then, as this grew deeper inside of me, you made my anxieties grew. 
I can’t just get you out of my head. You’ve been bothering me every time now.

Before I clearly realized it, I created a monster.

You ate my peace. You gave me a lot of confusions. It’s starting to hurt. 
I can’t escape from you for you always find your way to get me. You’ve been lurking behind the shadows. You’ve been visiting me on my sleep. You’ve been haunting my whole life.

Even if how much I wanted you, I just have to get rid of you. 
Destroy you before you completely devour the whole of me.

It’s hard for me to kill you so I have to find some other way.

I buried you, hoping that you would just rot there in time. 
No, you’re not dead yet. You were just buried alive.

The confusions and anxieties slowly grew smaller. Peace is slowly coming back to me and I’m slowly getting my life back in order.

I hoped this would just go on.

But no.

You’re also slowly making your way out of the ground.

Please no.

I just can’t have you back in my life now.

So no.

Please stay buried for the moment. 
Please just stay there.

So that if ever the time comes that I would stumble upon you and decided to dig you up, I won’t get affected by your existence anymore… that you can haunt me no longer… that I would want you no more.

So please.

Stay there.

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